Heeheehee. Jon, you'll hate this, but this might be the best analysis of F.E.A.R. yet. It's an animated video rant on Perseus Mandate, narrated by a deadpan Brit who speaks at the speed of sound. And I almost died laughing at his analysis of the problems.
"But I have to admit, the moments when the game does descend into sheer balls to the wall mind fuckerery is the only time the experience really comes alive for me. I'm running down a corridor when all of a sudden the lights come down and I'm in a different corridor and there's a blurry filter over my vision and I can hear what sounds like a moose being strangled in a tin bath. AWESOME...Wait, there's a corpse on the floor at the end of the hall. When I get closer, it jumps up and starts yelling at me like everything's my fault. FINALLY, I'm having a good time."
Mmyep. Also amazing: his analysis of Tomb Raider: Anniversary in which he refuses to refer to Lara's greatest physical assets, jumping through all sorts of hoops to avoid such lowbrow humor. Of course, he then ends with a 30 second diatrible in which he comes up with every synonym known to humankind, ending by praising her "stonkin' great tits."
I am amused, and just wasted 2 hours of my life laughing my ass off. I regret nothing!
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