Hrmph.

Well. We're one month into the school year, and I'm still all over the place. Alex is helping me grade and file, which is great. If not, I'd be completely overwhelmed. Bouts of crushing depression and "Oh God, why am I doing this to myself?" angst aside (so, there goes about 80% of my day), things are going well.

I've somehow gotten one class to listen to me, another to tolerate me and do the work as a personal favor (seriously, that's the tone of the class), and the third...Mmyeah. I dread seeing them. The problem with this teaching nonsense is that it's impossible to tell how I'm DOING. It's not about the instruction. It's about classroom management (which is useful) and assorted bullshit exercises the administration dumps on you at the last minute and only picks on the new teachers to complete.

Am I in serious shit if I don't finish whatever bizarre quest they send me on at 3:00 on a Friday, due at (I wish I were kidding) noon of the previous Thursday? What about the "school mandated survey" that is "imperative to ensuring continued success for our youngsters?" I got it done, but a day late. I thought I was in trouble...then I realized nobody -- NOBODY -- in the school except the other new English teacher actually gave the fucking thing. We were also the only ones who got bitched out over it.

Talking to the department head who shares my room is always both comforting, since she lets me know what petty shit administrators are looking to catch people on this week, and an exercise in frustration. Oh, okay. I have about 2 feet of extra board space, but I need to write the FULL state objective out, in addition to my objectives. And read them. Every period. That's cool, that's fine. I have nothing better to do. (To give you a sense, a V.S.C. objective takes about 3 typed lines and there are about 4-5 per lesson. That's a long, boring reading segment at the start of class.) Oh, right. Did I mention? Apparently, when I get evaluated, reading that is worth up to the equivalent of my instructional points. So I can completely ace a lesson and fail by not reading the objective. Or I can bomb a lesson and pass because I read the objective before the kids started throwing desks.

Shenanigans. Mad shenanigans.

I'm seriously considering coming up with a list of the stupid shit new teachers need to know that nobody bothers to TELL you. It seems useful. If they can write you up for failing to decorate your classroom correctly, perchance it would be a GOOD FUCKING IDEA to have a list of what should be in there.

Time to finish my lesson plan and print it out. (Yeah, no electronic copies, even if they're open on your laptop at all times. Baltimore hates trees and is on a quest to level the Amazon. Bonus points that they make the Ecology and Sustainability teachers do this too.) Then back to the salt mines. I wonder what gloriously asinine tasks they have lines up for this week! It's Catch-22 meets Hitchhiker's Guide meets Monty Python on a daily basis around here. Just, you know...minus the fun.